This post is going to be more personal than usual, so if that isn’t your thing, feel free to click away and read some tutorials. I’ll even link to some of my favorites to make it easier for you:

• DIY Green Tea Scrub
• Homemade Glass Cleaner
• Kitchen Organization
• DIY Halloween Boo Shirt (it may be December, but I wore it just the other day)

All right- if you’re sticking with me, here goes.

I miss you! It’s been a long time since I’ve been posting regularly on the blog.

I usually try to stick to my main topics on the blog (green cleaning, natural beauty, crafts, and organization), but for some reason I’ve been having trouble finding inspiration within those categories. I still love and am passionate about them, and I’ve been doing lots of projects in the interim, but I haven’t been posting about them. And so I’ve been contemplating why that is.

For bloggers, there’s a lot of difficulty in separating your personal life from your professional life. The lines can get really blurry. I’ve had a hard time trying to find where the line should go. I could post all the time about every detail in my life, but then when would I actually live it?

At the same time, there is a desire to present a curated picture. You want to show off only the best parts of your life. So you find yourself living your life like it’s a performance. Sure, my blog is about me, but it’s about the version of me that I show to you. I feel like in trying to create the best me to present on the blog I’ve lost the inspiration that I have to write. I’ve been lost between the desire to live my life fully without stepping back to take pictures all the time and wanting to show off the best of me and my family, and it’s left me feeling like nothing I write is right.

And there’s also another reason that I haven’t been posting often on the blog, and that is my health. You’ve probably noticed that I write about living with a chronic illness from time to time, and that’s because it’s a very big part of my life. I live with an illness called Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, or POTS. Basically my autonomic nervous system has a mind of it’s own and likes to do silly things like make my heart beat way too fast or make me feel like I’ve run a marathon when I walk to the kitchen. In addition I also get migraines, which can really knock me out.

Living with a chronic illness can be very unpredictable, and I go through good and bad phases. And I’ve been having a rough go of it for a while now. We’ve had crazy weather this year, which definitely exacerbates my symptoms, but sometimes I just have times when for whatever reason my symptoms are worse than usual. Some days I can wake up and feel relatively like a normal functioning human being, but some days I wake up and can barely get out of bed. And lately I’ve been having more of the bad days than good. I seem to be on the upswing now, but it hasn’t been a great time.

I’ve made my peace with my illness but I’ve never gotten good at talking about it. Writing about it on the blog definitely helps with me learning to communicate about my illness, but I try not to talk about it unless I have to.

Sometimes I feel like two people- one who is optimistic and energetic and loves going out and doing things, and one who just wants to stay home and take a nap. And honestly, I think that is something that most people can relate to, whether or not they have a chronic illness. We all try to present our best selves to the world, but we’re not our best selves all the time.

Lots of bloggers will tell you that there is a lot of pressure to present your best self on the blog. The less I feel like my best self, the less I feel like I can share my projects with people.

So, enough of that. I’m me, and I’m not always my best. I’m going to be getting back into blogging, and I’m going to share the things that inspire me.

I hope that you’ll like what I decide to write about now, and I’m going to try to be even more true to myself and my passions. And I’m excited!

Lots of love from your fellow procrastinator,

Susie

The post Maybe You’ve Missed Me appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

Caregivers are essential to any community. Being there for people during hard times is not only difficult, it is sometimes a thankless job. That’s why it’s important to find ways to let caregivers know just how much we truly appreciate them.

Some of you know that I’ve lived for years with a chronic illness, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS). I’ve been insanely lucky to have many amazing caregivers over the years. The two who have done the most work are two of my favorite people, my mom, and my husband.

My mom, Lisa, was my main fighter during the worst years of my life. She took me to countless doctor’s appointments, researched alternative and holistic treatments, and stood up for me when I didn’t know what to say. There is a lot more awareness and education about POTS now (not that we don’t have farther to go!), but 10 years ago when I was diagnosed, we had an incredibly difficult road. We went from specialist to specialist leaving without answers.

She spent hours and hours putting together an application to Mayo Clinic, which is where I was eventually diagnosed. And at every appointment she was there to speak for me and say “I know something more is going on here and we won’t stop until we have answers.” When we did have answers, she helped me to reach out to organizations to raise awareness and tell my story. Her persistence in telling my story has led to multiple people reaching out to us that ultimately were diagnosed with POTS because of reading about my experience. She has literally changed lives, beyond my own. I could never do enough to give back to her.

Lars has taken up the mantle of being my primary caregiver now, and he couldn’t do a more wonderful job. We both seem to know each other better than we know ourselves, and he often realizes that I’m not feeling well before I do. He is always there to help me on days when I struggle, regardless of his other commitments. Despite his limited experience with the medical world before he met me, has learned my treatments and triggers and the reality of living with a chronic illness. He reminds me to advocate for myself and advocates for me when I can’t do it myself.

Lars and I lived with my parents for a few months last year. I had one day where I woke up with one of the most terrible migraines I’ve ever had- the dreaded horrific migraine that I luckily only get about 1-2 times a year. But on those days I absolutely cannot function and spend the entire day on the bathroom floor. They can last more than a day if I don’t get some more heavy duty medication that I don’t have at home.

On that day, I had both my caregivers there by my side. Lars brought me a pillow while my mom called my doctor. They actually argued over who would take me to the doctor, even though they both had to work that day. Lars won in the end, and he made sure that I got some relief that day. My caregivers are amazing.

And their caregiving didn’t stop at helping me function- they have been incredible with emotional support. This can be one of the most difficult aspects of being a caregiver. A lot of people are up for the task of helping someone function or complete tasks, but being there to help deal with the emotional stressors that chronic illness creates takes someone special.

I can’t think of a better thing to be thankful for this holiday season than the caregivers in my life.

That’s why I am so excited to be partnering with Create the Good to spread awareness for this amazing caregiver appreciation- 25 Days 25 Ways to Care. You can nominate caregivers in your life for a chance to win gift cards ranging from $25-$500 dollars. To nominate someone, all you have to do is submit a short video (less than 60 seconds) explaining all they do to care for others.

One Grand Prize winner chosen by a panel of judges will get to choose a charity of their choice for a donation of $2500.

So if you know an inspiring caretaker, nominate them today! It’s the perfect way to let them know just how appreciated they truly are. You can learn more about official Contest Rules here.

The post Giving Back to Caregivers appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

I’m all about self-love and self-care. I don’t think you can overemphasize the importance of your relationship with yourself- I mean, it lasts your entire life!

That’s why I love finding ways to add a little extra joy into my day. I try to do this in so many ways; taking time to play with my adorable dog, procrastinating on pinterest, or doing a homemade facial mask.

I always try to do plenty of things that make me smile and feel a little more upbeat, especially as the seasons change and things get colder and darker. My latest favorite way to add joy into my day is with Tazo® Tea.

I like to take a moment to enjoy myself during that afternoon slump. You know it- right around 2 or 3 o’clock. My brain and body just start to move a little slower. Tazo tea is the perfect pick me up that helps me avoid the glum that comes in my afternoon slump.

Recently, my husband Lars started a new job working from home some of the time, and it’s been an adjustment for us. Usually I’m home working by myself, but now we are trying to get our routines in check. We both hit our afternoon slump around the same time.

A few times we have let it get to us- I mean the couch is so close and comfortable and there’s so many things recorded on our TV. But enjoying a cup of Tazo tea together helps us enjoy our day a little more without getting off track.

Tea is the perfect pick me up for us. A little sweetness, and sometimes a little caffeine, let’s be honest, make me feel invigorated and ready to get back to being productive. Having a joyful moment sipping on one of Tazo’s delicious blends has made our routine more seamless, and more fun. It takes just the right amount of time to brew and enjoy our tea while talking together, and we always feel more invigorated and joyful after.

Tazo has seriously delicious tea blends. My favorite is Passion®, because I love the sweetness of it, and I am a big fan of herbal teas. Lars loves the Zen blend. The lemongrass and spearmint added to green tea are a fun unexpected flavor that tastes amazing. And I love the classic Awake English Breakfast for when you need a stronger caffeine kick!

Don’t just take my word for it- you should try these blends yourself!

If you want to bring a little more joy into your routine, you can find Tazo tea blends at your local grocery store- or check out Tazo.com to find where you can find Tazo in your area.

The post Finding Joy in the 3 o’clock Slump appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

I’ve spent my life trying to develop strategies to deal with my anxiety. At 3 years old I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, commonly known as ADHD. My ADHD was so loud that it took until I was 18 for anyone to even notice that something more was going on inside me: I am incredibly anxious. It took years of introspection and therapy for me to even realize it. I’ve come to learn that everyone struggles with anxiety differently. So through my lifetime of dealing with anxiety- I’ve worked on strategies that help me cope, and these are my best ones.

Anxiety isn’t rational. It’s chemical. It takes over your brain.

This is gonna suck. I’m so not excited at all. I don’t want to be social; I don’t want to deal with people. I wish I could stay home and just watch TV. My heart is already going 1000 miles per hour. Ugh, my palms are sweating. My face is getting red. Everyone will be able to see I’m freaking out. They all don’t like me already. I’m not going to have any fun. I’m gonna lose all this valuable time I could have spent resting at home, where I’m safe from unexpected obstacles. Ugh, this week is gonna suck. Everything just sucks.

PAUSE

Breathe.

Where are these thoughts coming from?

They’re coming from the negative energy that flows through me. It affects every part of me. It makes my skin sweat, my face turn red, my hands fidget, my heart race, my stomach jump, it makes me worry incessantly, but worst of all: it gives me a feeling of dread mixed with fear that takes over my entire body. This energy is called anxiety. It is always present in my mind, body, and spirit.

Currently, there is no cure for anxiety, only treatments that help with the symptoms. Drugs can definitely help some people, but a lot of the time they have negative side effects. Drugs or not- I’ve spent my entire life working on these methods to help me deal with the constant anxiety in my life. These are my four best strategies.

1. Self-Talk

Self-talk can be your best friend or your worst enemy. It’s all a matter of if you let your anxiety take the wheel of your mind or if you take it yourself. I have literal battles in my head between my rational calm thinking and my anxiety. It’s an eternal struggle but the more you practice, the easier it gets.

The beginning of this article has an example of my self-talk ruled by anxiety. When I find myself on an anxiety-driven thought stream, I do exactly what I did in this article. PAUSE. Breathe. Then I ask myself a question about the rationality of the situation.

My go-to question is usually “what is the REALISTIC absolute worst thing that could happen?” really focusing on the realistic aspects. For example, let’s say I was driving about 10 mph over the speed limit and a cop started to pull me over. “Oh my gosh, I’m going to be thrown in jail. This is terrifying. I’m in so much trouble.” The anxiety starts to take over my body. PAUSE. Breathe. “What is the realistic worst thing that could happen?” “I’m only speeding; I’m not doing anything else wrong.

The worst that can happen realistically is that I’ll get a ticket. Maybe multiple depending on the officer. Everyone gets speeding tickets. You’re not going to jail. Everything is going to be okay.”

Putting a real world boundary on anxiety can really make a HUGE difference. My heart rate instantly starts to slow down the second I realize how much my anxiety dramatized the situation.

2. Communication with Friends and Family

Everyone in my life knows I struggle with anxiety. When my anxiety takes over, they know what it is but it’s still difficult for them to see me like that and they don’t always know how to respond. Some of the time it feels like no one understands my anxiety and no one can help me with it. But what I’ve learned is that the people you love want to help and they can IF you let them.

When I start to have an anxiety attack, my emotions go on a roller coaster. First, I start feeling nervous and negative about everything; usually I can win the battle there and my anxiety retreats. But if rationality doesn’t win there (probably because of uncontrollable outside factors) I start to get angry. My anger is destructive and scary and powerful. It’s also the hardest time for me to rationalize and calm down; not that it isn’t possible. The anger is so strong that it soon wears me out and is replaced with sadness. I start to cry.

The signals I’m sending from my emotional roller coaster are clearly mixed. So my friends and family don’t always know HOW to help me and it is my job to educate them. It is very hard to think, let alone communicate, rationally when you’re having an anxiety attack. When I am calm again, I reflect on my attack and what could have helped me. Then, it is my responsibility to communicate to my loved ones what they can do in the future to help me.

The hardest part is figuring out what they can do to help. Anxiety comes in so many forms: I have my constant anxiety that I feel every second, then I have my anxiety about certain situations, and then I have my emotional roller coaster of an anxiety attack. It’s hard to specify what you need for all these different situations and feelings. It’s confusing.

Most of the time, all I need is some support, preferably accompanied by a hug. A little “I love you. It’s okay. We’ll figure this out.” can make such a difference.

When I’m having an anxiety attack I feel like I am alone and I am carrying the weight of the world is on my shoulders.

Knowing someone is there to help me carry that weight is sometimes all I need to calm down. When I’m deep in an anxiety attack, it may take me a few minutes to realize my loved ones are supporting me because I’m at my most irrational. At that point, I may walk away. I usually come back after the sadness hits and can apologize. There are times however, that the anxiety attack was just too draining and I need until the next morning to have some clarity. My family knows this. Because I have communicated what I need to them, they are able to help support me.

3. Just Do It

Anxiety isn’t just in my mind. I feel it physically. When something makes me anxious I feel it first in my spine and chest. It feels like a paralyzing tingling, comparable to when your leg falls asleep. It makes my body tense up and my thoughts go on a whirlwind. The tingling makes its way from my torso to my arms, legs, and then finally out through my hands and feet.

Yes, I said paralyzing tingling. Anxiety can be immobilizing. One of the most immobilizing types of anxiety is anticipation anxiety: being nervous about something coming up. There are so many times that I know I have to do something but for some reason the thought of making the steps to get it done is overwhelming. It makes me avoid my obligation completely.

To get through this kind of anxiety, I have adopted the Nike philosophy: Just do it. I know it’s harsh, I know it’s hard. But sometimes it just has to be done. Anxiety is forever present, and if I let everything that made me anxious prevent me from doing it, I would never leave my bed.

Every time I say to myself, “Ugh, just do it!” and I actually get something done, I feel on top of the world. My self-confidence increases from facing my fear, I’m happy that the obligation is over and done with, and a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. The more you face your fears, the easier it gets because you know you can do it. Self-confidence is so important when it comes to anxiety and life in general. You have to believe you can beat the anxiety in order to do it. The more you practice winning little battles, the sooner you’ll win the bigger ones as well.

4. Smile and Laugh

Smile. Right now. Just smile. Not a little one, a HUGE smile, your happiest. Now hold it there. Do you feel a little happier? Even just a smidge? Smiling is my tactic for my constant anxiety. A smile can literally make anxiety retreat. Laughing makes you win the war. (Physically smiling actually makes you feel happier– it’s science!)

Most people think of my smile and/or laugh when they think of me. This is because I smile and laugh as much as I possibly can. The happier I am, the less I’m focusing on my anxiety. The more I’m enjoying and fully in a moment, the less my anxiety is questioning it. Let yourself laugh as often as possible. A laugh takes up your entire mind, body, and soul, which is exactly where anxiety lives. A laugh can be your greatest tool.

During an anxiety attack, I try to ask myself, “Do you want to feel negative and anxious or do you want to be happy and have fun?” I know I prefer to be happy and have fun. But making the choice to be happy and pushing your anxiety out of the way can feel like an apocalyptic war. I promise you, you can do it. Sometimes the anxiety is so seductive that you want to give in. But fighting for happiness is worth it. When I’m having an anxiety attack, my thoughts are on a negative, catastrophizing spiral and a laugh can almost always break that spell.

“Peace comes from the acceptance of the part of you that can never be at peace. It will always be in conflict. If you accept that, everything gets a lot better.” This inspiring quote is from Joss Whedon’s commencement address at Wesleyan University. I think it perfectly sums up the key to anxiety. When I accept that my anxiety is forever present and I know I can handle it is when everything gets a lot better. That is my peace.

The post How to Deal with Anxiety: 4 Strategies to Help You Conquer Your Anxious Thoughts appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

This is a post that isn’t easy for me to write. If you read my post about living with an invisible illness, you know how far people with chronic illnesses go to hide what is going on with us.

Well, if we’re hiding it, we aren’t having a productive conversation. We aren’t helping increase awareness. We aren’t making it easy for people in our lives to understand.

So today I’m going to get pretty vulnerable and bear my illness to you. I’m going to go through what a typical day looks like for me. It’s not like this every day- sometimes it’s way better, and sometimes it’s way worse. But for all you people out there who have loved ones with chronic illnesses, maybe this will help you understand. Only about 5 people in my life have seen what my actual typical day looks like, so this isn’t easy.

The illness I have is called Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS). Having POTS means that your autonomic nervous system doesn’t function correctly, especially when you are standing. If you want to read more about it, here is some info. I’m not going to get into the nitty gritty, but to help you understand this article more, some of my symptoms include: racing heart rate and low blood pressure when standing, difficulty changing positions quickly, nausea, difficulty with digestion, migraines, dizziness, chronic fatigue, and plenty of others.

I’m going to talk about spoons in this post. Spoons are representative of energy for people with chronic illnesses. It’s based on the Spoon Theory, which is one of the most brilliant pieces of writing ever about chronic illnesses. So make sure to read it, it is worth your time.

So here goes the day….

9:00 Am- Wake Up. Spoons: 15

No alarm. Disrupting my natural sleeping and waking cycles is a surefire way to set off a migraine. I open my eyes and adjust to the light. I open my phone and check emails and messages. I then start the process of standing up, because I need to get to the bathroom STAT. Apparently the three times I peed in the middle of the night were not enough, so I gotta go.

But standing up isn’t simple for me, especially after laying for so long. I mentally prepare myself to prop myself up a bit. Then I move into a sitting position, slowly. I sit for a few seconds, maybe a minute, before I stand up. When I stand my head pounds a little, typically, and my vision goes a little blurry. But I push through it and walk to the bathroom. Success! I brush my teeth and then head back to bed.

9:30 AM- Spoons: 14

Surprised that standing up to go to the bathroom loses me a spoon? I’m not. I’m used to it.

I prop myself up in bed and start checking my blog and social media. I respond to comments. I look over my editorial calendar for the week. I go on pinterest and browse a little for some inspiration.

I’m starting to get hungry. Or maybe just nauseous. It’s sometimes hard to tell. I walk the 30 or so steps to the kitchen to pick out some food. If I’m feeling pretty good I’ll make eggs, but today I’m feeling like I can’t stand for long so I eat some granola and yogurt- quick and easy. Sometimes just walking to the kitchen makes me so nauseous that I lose my appetite. It’s easier for me to eat with my legs up so I often eat sitting in bed.

I keep working on my blog, maybe edit some pictures or a post.

10:30 AM- Spoons: 13

Although I’ve been managing pretty well so far, the headache that was creeping behind my eyebrows is getting worse. I’m so used to having a headache that I often don’t notice it at first. When I start getting really irritable and feeling like simple tasks are really difficult, I realize how much pain I’m actually in.

So now it’s time to weigh my decision. Should I take medication? The earlier I take it the more it helps. But I don’t like to take it if I can avoid it, so I might wait a little longer to decide if it’s really here to stay. Do I give myself a toradol shot, take a toradol pill, or take a naproxen? If I take the naproxen and the headache gets worse, it’s always a bad idea because you can only take it every 12 hours. The toradol usually upsets my stomach. I can only give myself a shot 4 times a week, so is this migraine really bad enough that I can use up one of those valuable times?

I decide to put off deciding a little longer. I am having trouble concentrating through the pain so I look for something to watch on netflix to distract me and hope that it gets a little better.

11:00 AM- Spoons: 11

I am frustrated with my migraine and I want to know what’s causing it. I didn’t overdo it yesterday did I? Or did I eat something I shouldn’t have? Have I not been drinking enough water? I check my weather app and realize the pressure is a little on the low side today. So there’s my answer.

Deciding to wait to take the medication has cost me an extra spoon. I opt for a toradol pill and take it with some water. Sometimes I need a snack because you can’t take it on an empty stomach.

12:00 PM- Spoons: 9

The migraine is really taking it out of me. I’m trying to work but having a lot of difficulty. I took some pictures of a project I’m working on for a blog post, but just maneuvering the camera was pretty exhausting.

I look in the fridge for some leftovers. There aren’t any. I don’t have a lot of energy to make something that requires a lot of work, so I make some pasta with pesto. I know I should be eating more protein.

By the time I’m done eating the medicine is helping a little more.

1:00 PM- Spoons: 7

Making the pasta and working on my blog have been pretty exhausting. I think it’s about time for my nap. I don’t nap every single day, but I probably nap about 4-5 times a week.

2:30 PM- Spoons: 8

I have a few etsy orders to make. The nap was a little refreshing so I decide that I will make them now. I mix up the ingredients and take breaks sitting while monitoring the melting and stirring. I usually listen to a podcast while I work.

I always have fun making products and I’m excited to see them come together. Once the orders are done I’m pretty oily and messy. Taking a shower will cost too many spoons so I just wash up and change into yoga pants, a t shirt, and a zip up hoodie. Pretty much my daily uniform, plus or minus pajama pants.

I also don’t think I have enough spoons to put all the packaging and shipping together for the orders, so I decide I will do that tomorrow.

3:30 PM- Spoons: 6

I head back to bed with my laptop and start editing the pictures from earlier. I find it easier to edit pictures first and write the blog post second most of the time. Standing up to work on the orders made me pretty dizzy, so I have to take breaks from editing the pictures to let myself settle a little. Sometimes I put on my glasses hoping they will help with the dizziness, but they never do.

So I push through it like usual and try to get as much done as I can.

4:30 PM- Spoons: 5

Lars and I both really like it when I have dinner ready when he comes home from work. It means I will have at least one good meal that day and neither of us has to wait until we are hangry to eat. Don’t worry, Lars alway does the dishes.

Since I haven’t had really healthy meals today I decide that I should make dinner. Dinner is usually some sort of poultry and vegetables, and usually a salad as well. I also really love making things in my slow cooker. I make some chicken and sweet potatoes, a yummy classic and super easy to make. Although the meal is easy, it still takes a lot out of me.

5:30 PM- Spoons: 3

Lars comes home from work and we eat dinner. We don’t have any plans tonight so we talk about whether we should do some chores and errands, watch a movie, maybe go out and do something. We usually decide to stay in because by the time he comes home I’m usually pretty low on spoons.

So we decide to watch a movie, but it’s one I’ve already seen before so I decide to work on my blog post while we watch.

6:30 PM- Spoons: 1

My medicine is starting to wear off and the migraine is coming back. After eating and cooking my body is feeling pretty worn out. I ate sitting up at the table, which costs another spoon (as opposed to eating reclining on the couch or bed). I really don’t want to take more medication, but I decide to because I’m almost out of spoons and pushing through the pain is kind of out of the question at this point.

7:00 PM- Spoons: 1

We watch the movie in bed so I can be most comfortable. (but one of these days we will get a comfortable couch so I like hanging out in the living room more).

Watching the movie with a migraine and working on the blog post cost me another spoon, so I’m out now.

8:30 PM- Spoons: 0

The movie is over and it’s time to wake Falafel (our pet hedgehog). Even though I’m out of spoons I need to be a good hedge-mom so I know I have to play with her.

I coax her out of her tshirt and give her a towel to stand on. Lars and I play with her and feed her treats but she is feeling like a grouch and trying hard to hide. So we decide to let her play in her maze, which is her favorite thing.

We sit around and talk for a while, checking on Falafel, who has fallen asleep in the maze.

9:30 PM- Spoons: -1

I bet you didn’t know spoons could get negative. What that means is that I’m borrowing off of tomorrow’s spoons. I don’t know how many I’ll have tomorrow. 15, like today, is pretty average, but playing with Falafel pushed me over the edge. I decided it was worth it, and I hope I don’t regret it tomorrow. I weighed the options and since we have leftovers from dinner I can probably get away with not making dinner tomorrow, so I can save on those spoons. Or maybe I will put off packaging the etsy orders another day. I’ll find the spoon savings somewhere.

10:00 PM- Spoons: -2

I get ready for bed and change into pajamas. Brushing my teeth when I’m already so low on spoons cost me another one. Spoons are relative, so the less you have, the more it takes to do simple activities.

Lars and I get into bed and talk for a while. I fall asleep somewhere between 10:30 and 11.

And then it will be tomorrow.

The dangerous thing is when you continually borrow the next days spoons. Today, I borrowed 2 spoons from tomorrow. But if tomorrow there is a bad storm or who knows what else going on, I may wake up with even less spoons than expected. I’m hoping to get an average amount of spoons (about 15) but I know I already borrowed 2 (bringing me down to 13). But if tomorrow is a bad day, I might only wake up with 9 spoons, and I’ll already have used 2 of those, leaving me with 7. Borrowing spoons is a huge gamble.

People with chronic illnesses are always told to push ourselves. What people don’t realize is that we already are. But you can only borrow off of the next days spoons for so long before the day that you wake up with no spoons at all. Pushing yourself is a balancing game, just like everything else we do. So I push myself trying to be as independent as possible and get stuff done, but there comes a point when pushing yourself is hurting yourself. And it isn’t always easy to find that point.

I don’t mean for this to be a sad article.

I’m actually a very happy person. Some of you may read this and notice how isolated I am. I spend most days at home alone and only see Lars at night. But those are my average days. Lars and I usually see his family once a week and my family once a week. I see my friends 1-2 times a month and Lars’s friends 1-2 times a month. Once in a while we have a busy social weekend and it takes me a few days to recover. I’m not completely isolated. Although, compared to a healthy person, it might really seem like it.

I work really hard on having a positive outlook and I use all different kinds of strategies. And it works for me.

I am happy with my life. It may not be what I imagined when I was younger, or what most people think of as a happy and productive life. But for me, I can find value in small things. Like days when I have enough spoons to leave the house and go for a walk. Or when Falafel does something particularly cute. Or being lucky enough to have found the love of my life and have such a great support system.

So don’t feel sorry for me. I am really happy. What I want for you to get out of this article is a better understanding of a day in the life of chronic illness. Living with limitations has certainly taught me to judge others less, and I guess that’s what I’m hoping you will get out of this. Before you judge someone with a chronic illness for not working, think about what their life is like. People who meet me when I’m out and about on a good day don’t know that I spend about 80% of most days in bed. They don’t know how hard my body is working to stand and talk to them.

So have compassion for the people in your life, because you don’t know what they’re dealing with. Whether it’s a chronic illness (physical or mental), a family problem, a traumatic experience, or anything else, you have no idea what they are really going through. They probably don’t know what you are going through either! We can all stand to employ a little more empathy in our lives.

Thanks for reading! If you liked this post, you should also check out 15 Things Not to Say to Someone With a Chronic Illness

The post Chronic Illness: A Day in the Life appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

Hi friends! I’m sorry for my temporary absence from writing. I was experiencing a bit of blog/ wedding planning/ life planning overload. But I’m back! And to make up for the time I’ve missed, I am giving you a bunch of free printables this week!

I’m generally an optimistic person. It’s something I work hard to be. And it isn’t always easy. So I have to remind myself of how awesome life is on a fairly regular basis. I’ve been having a lot of fun lately learning more about graphic design, and so I wanted to express optimism through these printable posters. Each are 8.5″ x 11″ so you can print them on standard paper. Just click the image to download the printable PDF.

Put them somewhere you will see them and admire away!

I tried to put a little something for everyone. These are inspirational quotes that resonated with me. So I hope you like these. I’ll explain what each of them means to me and why I chose that quote.

I didn’t realize I was gonna get as mushy gushy as I did in this post! So, you’ve been warned!

1. Broken Crayons Still Color

This quote could easily be taken negatively, because it starts out with the word broken. I choose not to see it that way. I see it for the whole picture. “Broken crayons still color.” What this means to me is that even if things go wrong and life doesn’t go the way you want, and even if you can’t change that, you can still thrive. You can still do what you want to and hope to do. Going through hard situations won’t change that. You can survive the worst. And everything will still work.

2. Be The Person Your Dog Thinks You Are

Woof! The silhouette there is my dog Shaki. She’s a nut.

Anyways, if you’ve ever had a dog (and I really hope you have!!) you will know that nothing is as amazing as how your dog loves you. They truly think you are god’s gift to dogkind. Dogs would do anything for their owners. The see you as the ultimate person worthy of their love and affection. Well guess what? You are! You are worthy of dog-level love and affection from the people (and dogs) in your life. So strive to be who your dog thinks you are. They only see your kindness, your generosity, your zest, your love, your compassion.

3. Perfect People Are Boring

I wasted way too much of my life trying to be perfect. My teenage self was very insecure. Who isn’t? Well I tried to deal with that by being perfect, and not showing my vulnerability.

You know what? That’s just boring. You’re a human. I want to know your story. I want to know what you’ve gone through and what you consider your flaws and what lessons you’ve learned from mistakes. I want to connect with your humanity. The things that we enjoy in our friends and loved ones are not their ability to be perfect at something. It’s their ability to show you their true selves and be willing to make mistakes that makes them fun and relatable. Don’t strive for perfection. Not only is it a waste of time- it’s boring!

4. Everything Is Gonna Be Okay

This is probably my favorite inspirational quote. It might not sound inspirational to you, but I really think it is. Whenever I’m stressed out this is an amazing reminder for me. I think back through all the things that I’ve been through and everything has ALWAYS been okay. The process of stressing out about things is usually worse than whatever outcome it is that I’m so scared of.

Even if things fall apart, you still get to be you. And you are awesome. So don’t worry about it- it’s gonna be okay.

5. No One Else in The World Can Be You as Well as You Can

This is probably the most important (and true) thing you can remind yourself. There is only one you. You can try to be someone other than who you are, but it’s a losing battle. You already are you. And no one in the world is better than being you than you are. So when you are feeling down, just remember, I’m the best at being myself in the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD!

I hope you like these free printable inspirational quotes! I might come out with some more in the future, so keep your eyes open!

The post Inspirational Quote Free Printable Art appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

Since it’s thanksgiving and all, I thought I’d write a few thank you notes. After all, I’m gonna need practice for the wedding. Alright, jokes aside, I do have a lot of things to be thankful for. And I thought this would be a great format to share it, and hopefully help other people realize how many things they have to be thankful for too.

Thinking of things you are grateful for every day can help make you a happier person. I know it’s certainly something I do. So brace yourself for lots of thanking. Warning: it may get sappy.

I have to start with my fiance first right? I think that’s a rule. Anyways….

Dear Lars,

Thank you for doing your best to make me happy every day that we have been together. Thank you for all the sacrifice and hard work you do at work and at home. You are the best support system I could ask for. Thank you for being you, for making me laugh, for doing the dishes, for cleaning Falafel’s cage, for surprising me, for loving me, for the silliness, for the back rubs, for carrying heavy things, and for making me smile. I don’t want to stop writing this note, but I will go on forever if I don’t stop. I love you.

Dear Falafel the Hedgehog,

Thank you for bringing cuteness into my life every night. Thank you for snuggling in my pocket. Thank you for making the cutest noises when you eat treats. Thank you for being the best wheel runner and explorer. Thank you for not judging me when I sing to and about you. Thank you for giving us a use for the ridiculous tshirts we were given. Thank you for making us laugh and smile.

Dear Mom and Dad,

Thank you for being the most wonderful supportive parents anyone could ask for. Thank you for knocking me down a peg when I’m being a know it all. Thank you for showing me what true friendship is. Thank you for being cool enough to be my friends now that I’m not embarrassed of you like I was when I was a teenager. Thank you for supporting me every day and helping me whenever I need it. I literally don’t know what I would do without you.

Dear Harry Potter,

Thank you for being an endless source of entertainment and inspiration in my life. Thank you for teaching people to love reading and be tolerant and understanding. Thank you for the comfort.

Dear Hannah,

Thank you for looking out for me. Thank you for working so hard on our relationship. Thank you for forgiving me when we fight. Thank you for all the many, many laughs and smiles. Thank you for being the best sister ever. Thank you for being the perfect example of people who are complete opposites being friends. Thank you for being there whenever I need you.

Dear Amazon Prime,

Thank you for being so fast. Thank you for getting me ingredients when I need them in a hurry. I honestly don’t know what I would do without you.

Dear the rest of my family and friends,

I had to lump you all together because if I wanted to individually express all the things I have to be thankful for this post would have never ended. I have the best support system I could ever dream of. Thank you for the advice, for the fun, and all the help you’ve given me. Thank you for teaching me how wonderful and different humans are. Thank you for helping me learn who I am and never judging me.

Dear dogs,

Thank you for showing us what a loving heart is.

Dear My Fabulous Readers,

Thank you for being a positive and wonderful blog community. Thank you for every one of you that reaches out to me. Thank you for commenting. Thank you for just glancing at a post. Thank you for making what I do more fun. Thank you for catching mistakes when I make them. Thank you for telling me your stories. Thank you for making me feel like my words can make a small difference for a few people. Thank you for giving this blog meaning and purpose.

Thank you all.

Love,

Susie

The post Thank You Notes appeared first on Pins and Procrastination.

I was having a conversation with my fiancé yesterday about maturing and being less self-centered, and it got me thinking. A trait we associate with the elderly is being wise. But although we know wisdom comes with age, what if it also comes with being less able-bodied?* I may sound crazy to you, but entertain my idea for now.

I find myself thinking, when I am in a darker mood, what my life would be like without any physical limitations: to have boundless spoons, to not think through every action. I try not to let myself go there, but there are times you just can’t help it. And I usually come out with the conclusion that I love who I am and I would be completely different without my illness because it has changed how I think and live. I truly believe it has made me wiser.

Compared to others my age, my priorities are different. My outlook on life is definitely different. Unlike many of my peers, I don’t partake in almost any risky behaviors. Going out all night and getting drunk, or trying an extreme sport, or even just driving fast are things that I can’t do. Some might think I’m missing out. Maybe I am. But I’ve had to readjust my outlook and goals for what I know I can handle. I know my physical and psychological limitations better than pretty much anyone I know. If that’s not wise, I don’t know what is.

I can’t distract myself with exciting things. I don’t treat my body like it will be young and carefree forever. Instead of using my body to have fun exciting experiences, which I just can’t do, I spend a lot of time thinking and reflecting. I take care of myself and I know my mind inside and out.

Talking to others my age, it seems to me they just go with the flow. They don’t know how to say no. They keep people in their lives that may not be good for them. They do things they don’t like to fit in. They don’t know what they need in a relationship or how to ask for it. They don’t know how to love themselves.

I am not afforded the luxury of going with the flow. I don’t have the energy to say yes to everything or to deal with people who make my life harder. I know my needs and I can communicate. I love myself more than anyone else I know. There isn’t much of a flow in my life; physically I am always walking against the flow and it isn’t easy. Dealing with this struggle of mine has made me learn what I need and what to do about it.

Now I’m not saying there is anything wrong with being able-bodied. All I’m saying is that when you can’t have crazy reckless fun in your 20’s, it can make you wiser faster than those who can. And there is nothing wrong with that. Different life circumstances dictate different actions.

As humans, we are extremely adaptable. We adjust to situations to the best of our ability. We learn new skills. Maybe being wise is a skill for those who are not able-bodied. Being unable to do “normal” activities takes a lot of adjustment and reflection. We adapt. We become wiser.

You could make the argument that going through any kind of struggle makes you wiser. I definitely think that’s true. One part of wisdom comes from experience. But for those with chronic illnesses, wisdom comes from realizing your own limitations, accepting them, and adapting. Wisdom comes from stepping outside the cultural norms for your peer group and learning more about yourself and what you can handle and enjoy. Those who are able-bodied don’t have to learn their own limitations until they age. I learned mine when I was 17.

Sometimes I feel chronic illness has taken a lot away from me. But in all honesty, it has given me so much more than it has taken. So, to my body, I say: thanks for the wisdom.

*I am speaking from my own experience of having physical limitations. This in no way means that chronic illnesses do not include mental illnesses that still leave you able-bodied. For those with mental illnesses, just replace able-bodied with people who don’t have mental illnesses. 

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